Hello FOM (Friends of Meghan)

I sit here in the Holiday Inn Media Center in the heart of down town Burbank (at least I think I am in down town Burbank, it really just sounded good) anyway I am for sure in Burbank.
My cat is here with me, coming down from her kitty high, (I drugged her up for the flight here)
The moon, a perfect crescent stained orange by LA ozone, hangs just out side my window watching me drink my sedation beer. While I am completely and totally 100% exhausted, I find I can’t calm my mind enough at night to sleep properly. I also find that beer tends to help remedy that situation  Anyone else find that?

I have been here in this Holiday Inn many times before when working for Disney so this seems a little like home and it comforts me in some strange way.

I am going to try to recount the last 7 days to you. They have been the most, worst, pinnacle, utmost, …all the superlatives… of my life (I think) at least those that I can think of and haven’t blocked out.
If I never do this moving bull shit again, it will be too soon. At least the next time I move I hope to not do it alone. This relocation really sucked! Really really

Lets start on Thursday the 19th.
My client in New Jersey, being the nice guy he is, says to me on Wednesday ( I can’t believe it was only 7 days ago) “Just go home tomorrow” I knew the project was technically finished. I would have just been hanging around for the sake of making it look good if I stayed. To be honest I had been phoning it in (as my boyfriend likes to say) for the last week and was way more focused on my move than on training him. He knew it and just let me go. I gratefully thanked him and left New Jersey in my dust. To be fair N.J was actually lovely and my client a joy to work with.
So I wake up at 2am on Thursday morning in order to get to shower and get to Newark airport by 4, after being stalked by the hotel bar tender until 11pm. (he stole my room number from my bill and knocked on my door 10 minutes after I left the bar….eeewwwww). He actually called first. I remember I was on my cell phone when my hotel phone rang. I went to answer it but remembered no one had my room number except the creepy bar tender. I ignored the phone. Not 5 minutes later a knock on the door came. I was still on the phone and I know he heard me. He knocked one more time then finally left. What a creep.
Anyway, the plan was to catch the 6am Newark to Dallas flight, that would get me into the Springs around 10am. I had plans to drop off my car for its 40K check up and get my hair cut before attending a going away party at 5p. I had it all worked out with rides (since my car would be at the mechanic’s all day) and appointments. It was a perfect plan as my original flight got me in at 9:30pm
I had called the day before to just change the flight and pay the $100 change fee (much better than the uncertainty of stand-by) American told me that because I wanted to change the lay over city (from Chicago to Dallas) they would have to cancel my current reservation and re-book my ticket at a cost of $800. Unacceptable. I would just have to fly stand by.
So, after the bar stalker and a sleepless night, after a painful stress puke in the shower, (gross) after driving an hour on the New Jersey turnpike during that nether time where even the likes of Tony Saprano are sleeping, I optimistically stand in line to check into my flight. The lady behind the counter condescendingly guided me over to the self check in kiosk and proceeded to explain to me how to check in all by myself. I decided to ignore her belitteling schpeel as I had other things on my mind. Before she could finish I politely pointed out that I wanted to fly stand-by.
“oh”
That’s when I found out that they don’t let you even stand by for a flight to a city that is not on your original itinerary.
(a slight explination)
My Original flight was from Newark to Chicago, Chicago to the Springs. But since the flight to Chicago was at 4pm (getting me home at 9:30pm) I wanted to go from Newark to Dallas and Dallas to the Springs getting me home at 10am)
That’s a big neg-a-tory
Did anyone else know that? Seriously…in all my days of traveling (7 years worth) I have never come across this rule. Now maybe it is because I’ve never wanted to do this or maybe it is because of new regulations or maybe, just maybe others bent the rules for me and this be-oughch wasn’t gonna .
Well I’m sure you know what happened next…que the water works.
Now I wasn’t doing this for theatrics. I was honestly freaking out. There was no way in hell I was going to wait around until 4 bloody pm to catch the flight, plus, all my plans just went straight out the window.
Bad bad….all bad.
I begged her through teary eyes‘please don’t make me stay here until 4pm’
Through harsh words and eye rolling on her part and tears and snot on mine, she booked me on a Newark to Chicago, Chicago to Dallas and Dallas to the Springs flight that got me in at 4p. Not as good as 10a but not as bad as 9p. There went all my plans for Thursday (except for the going away party)
I landed in the Springs, got my luggage, threw it in Betty and drove straight to the going away party that started at 5p. The girls were great and had a beer waiting for me. I was so stressed, I couldn’t drink it. ME, Meghan McGuinness, I took two sips of my lovely home town brew. I think I had one piece of my appetizer. All I could think about was the drive to California the next day. I cried my apologies to the girls that I was so lame, I cried some more and went home to my cat, my bed and the Cartoon Network. That night I slept the best I had slept in 2 weeks.

Tuesday October 17, 2006

Today was much better. I created the blog last night. I think writing it all down and sharing it with everyone was just the cathartic mental enema I needed. I also swam for half an hour. Maybe I needed some exercise too. I can’t say that I slept like a baby, but I slept better than I have since I passed out at Linda and Nancy’s on Saturday. Did I tell you I got really drunk that night and that I really needed it?
I spent the majority of the day actually working (shock!) We (client and I) had to drive to Stamford for an automation meeting. Those of you who don’t know what an automation meeting entails, thank your lucky stars for your bliss. Those of you who do know what that is, know that my head as imploded but I am recovering nicely.

My client who, to his misfortune, asks me how I’ve been holding up (and therefore gets the daily updates) decided that ¾ of a day spent talking automation was enough for one in my delicate mental state. While I enjoy the not working and am grateful for the extra planning time, all it really amounts to is extra OCD time. I spent the time looking for places to see on Saturday (assuming I get there in one piece) and annoying my new boss with silly questions like '...when should I show up for work on Thursday?' and '...will I be able to go home for the holidays?'
She had to stop me at the holidays question. Perhaps I should actually clock in before I start thinking about Thanksgiving and Christmas.
I’m down in the hotel bar now, having a Smithwicks. Ahh the foamy goodness. Perhaps tonight I shall sleep the sleep of the moved and established.

Monday the 16th

Threw up this morning. I’m so stressed! Why I am I making this so hard? I’m glad I told my client I’m leaving, I can at least tell him about my stress this weekend. He is my only friend here in Jersey. He seems genuinely worried about me and tells me that I don’t seem to be the kind of person to let this stuff bug me. He said it much better than I recounted and it made me feel a little stronger and a little less stupid. Why am I being so neurotic about this? This is not like me. So I made a plan. My plan is to fly home from Jersey on the 19th then get in the car and drive to Burbank on the 20th. Find a place to live, (easy right?) leave my car there, fly back on Monday the 23rd, let in the movers, let them pack me, load up the truck on the 24th and hopefully fly back either Tuesday night or Wednesday morning. Perhaps to start on the 26th. Still waiting to get confirmation of dates from the disreputable movers. By the way, called the movers (Nationwide Relocation Services) and told my Senior Moving Consultant about the bad web site situation. He said that the web site was created by their competition (hmmmmm) that they are currently suing those people for slander and to check their Better Business Bureau rating if I didn’t believe him. I did and they are in good standing. He also mentioned that the moving company they hired is called Avalon (I believe I have heard of them) and they have an A+ rating from the BBB. All I can do at this point is have faith that I have enough good karma in my karmatic bank account to see this through and that those people who posted a complaint are the exception not the norm. I have no choice but to have faith otherwise I will remain sleepless. Besides, I have nothing of value or that can't be replaced. All my furniture is cheap Target particle board anyway. If it gets broken, so be it. (deep breath...release) oooommmmmmmmm
At this point, I just want it all over with. I hope I can sleep tonight.

Sunday the 15th
DIASTER!!!
Surfing the net and found a web site that was basically devoted to people posting their dissatisfaction for the moving company I so flippantly chose to move my possessions.
Sick I am….SICK! Visions of me being stranded without my stuff. Thoughts that I am a careless, stupid woman. Why didn’t I check them out before choosing them? I’m so stupid!!! I was able to talk to Matt, thank god. He knows exactly what I need to hear to calm me down. He doesn’t lie to me, but he focuses on the positive and that is exactly what I need. I DIDN’T call Wednesday’s friend! It just sucks that I have to do this all on my own with no one to help me. Not only do I have to work on my life move, but make sure my client’s needs are met too. If ever there was a time for retail therapy now is it.
I lie in bed all night scared of my stupid, careless, uneducated decision. I didn’t sleep well.

Saturday the 14th.

Drove up to Springfield MA to see the work peeps (VCI’s office is in Springfield MA) 2 .5 hour drive. It was nice actually. Colleagues partner just got a job in Palm Springs on a golf course. She promised to teach me golf. Nice to have another friend in the 'hood'. (side note...also found out that a friend's brother and his wife just moved to Long Beach...what is it with the left coast migration?)
I had fun and I didn’t think of my move at all. What a nice break

Friday the 13th

Got the movers to pack for me (little pressure off) Told the recruiter that I was thinking of starting on the 30th but that date didn’t go over too terribly well either...how does one please these people? Sent that woman an email saying I’m feeling pressured and I don’t appreciate it. She replied with the usual ‘…we understand…’ and ‘lets talk next week…’ Typical even headed HR reply. I hate sane people right now.

Thursday the 12th
Disney does not understand why I cannot start on the 16th. It is a little something I call responsibility. I still have obligations to my current employer….DUH!!!!
Here they are…making me wait since May to get an offer, then…when they do offer, they want me to just drop everything and come right out. As it stands I am in New Jersey until the 19th. I have no home yet in Burbank (but I have been looking at places since July on the net) I have no time to pack, I have not rented out my place in the Springs yet, I have no plan. I’m starting to get a little panicky. (ya think???!!!)
Thank god a friend called (a sane friend) and calmed me down a lot! She told me I would be fine and it will work itself out. Don’t care if its true or not, it is calming and what I needed to hear. I mean come on…I’m not going to be destitute and giving blow jobs for food…I’m still a little mad at my friend I mentioned on Wednesday.
I’m was still a little panicky.
I got a mover and am paying them to pack for me. This makes me feel a little better.

While in bed...not sleeping from obsessing about being destitute and needing to give blow jobs for food....I remembered I had some money in an IRA account. I didn't want to take the money out, but put on a scale of pros and cons...taking money out of my IRA sures-the-hell beat out giving blow jobs for sustenance and wi-fi.
Moving may suck but I won't!
With the IRA money, I decided to pay off my car. This will free up 3oo bucks a month to pay to for the car insurance hike(sigh)and I transfered the balance of a high interest credit card to another lower interest card (which I should have done anyway)I then called a few landlords I found on the internet and begged them to rent me their places even though I haven't seen them. No one seemed keen to do this (thank goodness) but I think I can scratch them off the potential list as neurotic tenant-potentials tend not to make the short list.
I spoke to a different friend who listened and understood all the stress I was under. She made me feel a lot better. I slept better. I love my friends.

Wednesday the 11th

Had to talk to the boss' boss. She is a great woman, but very intimidating. I wasn't looking forward to it but in the end she accepted my resignation and promised me a spot at VCI should Disney not work out.
Man did that make me feel good. I've never been treated so well by an employer (yes...Harris included) SO nice of them. It is wonderful to be able to put past bosses down on your resume as a reference (unlike some bosses I’ve had….eh hem)

Called the Diseny recruiter and told her they accepted my resignation. She asked me if I could start on the 16th. I had to explain to her that I had an obligation to my current client until the 19th. I don't think that went over all that well.

Meanwhile...back at the hotel....I started my continuing search for a warm comfy nest to call my own in the Burbank area. I emailed my new boss with a link to a potential home and asked her for her opinion of my WAY too expensive place I found. She replied back with 'I don't get it' (which I took to mean I had chosen badly) and attached links to tons of places she found on Craig's List. (never been a craigs list fan...am I the only one?) While I felt very lucky to have such help, there was that old doubt creaping back up my yellow spine. Does anyone else think therapy is in order??!!!

I started to panick just a little so I called my good friend who lives in the LA area. She went through this very thing when she moved from middle America to the cold lonly city of LA. Surely if there were anyone in the world who could understand my plight, she could. I needed a friendly voice to talk me off the ledge. I called, and asked for her guidance and sage advice...
What she preceeded to tell me was...
I hope you are happy with your decision.
The women in LA are bitches
The men are hopeless
You will never find another Matt in LA
My replies to her onslaughts began to get shakey...

You are making how much...that is college money and I have no idea how you are going to live.
You are going to need a room mate.
When I first moved to LA I was making 80 and I was starving.

I told her about my car insurance...how it was 400 every 6 months but when I move it will be 900 every 6. I started crying. She heard my tears and didn't stop. In fact she re-stated all the above points a second time.
I told her that she would not get the 'cheer up your friend' award. In an effort to somehow make light of the situation.
All she said to that was
"I'm just telling you like it is Meghan, you need to know it is not easy in this city."

Needless to say when I hung up, I began to bawl like an infant for the rest of the night. I was seriously worried the people in the next room would call the front desk. I got no sleep that night and couldn't eat a damn thing in the morning.
She was right, I didn't have any money to do this thing. I had no idea how much money I would be taking home and therefore how much rent I could afford. I was so alone. I couldn't talk to Matt who was in Toronto and with out his phone. I couldn't call my mom because me being in hysterics would only upset her too. The one friend I thought would understand me the most and I needed to talk me through this stressfull time, just pushed me off the ledge.
Moving sucks!

Tuesday the 10th
Told my boss today that I am resigning. That was hard. I was nervous and I knew it was a bolt from the blue. VCI had been so good to me and good to work for I didn't want to burn a bridge in anyway. They are a small but growing company that was a pleasure to work for. It was nice that they refer to you by your first name and not your last name or some screwed up version of a last name, or worse, your social security #.
I know that Disney is a big big corp with slow turning cogs…the word omnipotent comes to mind. Plus it meant moving to my so called 9th circle of hell and giving up my little home in the mountains I’ve made for myself. Big sacrifice for Meg…but I know Disney can open doors for me. I hope I will make a fluffier home for myself maybe someday in London 
VCI didn't accept my resignation right away. I had to talk to my boss' boss to ensure there wasn't anything they could do for me.

Monday the 9th of October
Finally got the offer from Disney. I have known about this position since about May of this year (’06)
My soon-to-be boss called me up and said ‘I’m making this job description and thought of you…you interested?” Obviously I’ve worked with her before. She was my boss when I first started working in Colorado Springs (in '99) and I later worked with her as a software provider (she was the client) when she left to work for Disney. (does that make sense?)
So she called me and said the position doesn’t even exist yet but once it does...would I be interested…and yes, I would have to move to the Burbank area.
I said I would be interested but continued on with my life knowing in the back of my head a move will be eminent.

I finally heard from the recruiter on Sept 18th and got the official offer on the 9th of October. Funny thing about corp. America…they make you wait and wait and wait and wait…then, when they want you…they expect you to drop what you are doing and get your ass to work. Not so easy for me as I was on client site in New Jersey for 5 weeks when she called on the 18th. I told her I had no intention to leave my company nor my client high and dry. When I started to discuss a reasonable start date with her, (November 6th) she didn't quite agree.

And in other news….Today in Hell it’s a frosty 30 degrees.

As most of you by now know…I have accepted a position at ABC Cable Networks (a.k.a. Disney) in Burbank CA.
As most of you are even MORE aware…CA has never been my happy place. I have a home in Colorado Springs that am seriously in love with. It is my first home…I own it, I am loath to leave it.
Unfortunately there is this thing in one’s life that happens...it is called growth. Even more unfortunately-ly with growth comes growing pains.

The following are the chronicles of my growing pains as they happen. Hopefully I will laugh about this one day, until that day….OUCH!